Ok, so this toss-pot goes on to YouTube and puts up a video diary entry paying out Australians, kangaroos, our national anthem, boomerangs and - worst of all - Vegemite! Now c'mon, don't dis the Vegemite - it's part of our staple diet. After all, any food substance that is made from the same ingredients as beer has to be good!
From watching the clip, I draw the following conclusions:
- toss-pot has eaten Vegemite once in his life and didn't like it, therefore no-one can possibly like it and Vegemite was created purely as a joke against unassuming Americans.
- toss-pot has problems articulating simple words - for those playing at home it is Veg-e-mite (just as it looks), not Vee-ge-mite.
- all national anthems are written about condiments.
- the Australian Aboriginals invented the boomerang when they came to Australia over 40,000 years ago purely for the purpose of fooling tourists in the 20th century.
- toss-pot has poor hand-eye co-ordination.
- scientific evidence proving that prehistoric kangaroos existed over 50,000 years ago is incorrect.
- nothing makes a tourist feel more at home than a fanny-pack (known as a bumbag in Australia due to fanny meaning a completely different part of the human female anatomy).
- kangaroos are vicious killing machines.
- toss-pot is afraid of things he has not seen in real life.
- the sole purpose in every Australian's life is to make fun of Americans. (We actually prefer taking the piss!)
Songs played while writing this entry:
"Human Behaviour" Bjork
"Twin Town" Ian Wilkie v Timo Maas
"Mutant Was In Love" Taho
"Khe Sanh" Cold Chisel
"Ring Ring Ring (Ha Ha Hey)" De La Soul